my true colors.

Well since I really have nothing else to say I thought I would share how I worked out a difficult day in my life. It doesn't happen often, but when it does happen, I like to punch bad days right in the groin.. (I say PUNCH in the GROIN because I imagine bad days - if they were people - would of course be taller than me :] )I have been having those days where I feel downright worthless, like a leech almost. Like I take & take from life and can't muster up enough strength to give back more than I receive.

Anyway, if anyone knows me - they know this is truly out of character for me & in light of my new mind-set - "thinking glass half-full" I had to work out my attributes on a piece of scratch paper tonight. You know how people make pro & con lists to make decisions? I recalled something my Dad said (probably the only sentence in any talk my dad has EVER given at church that I remembered). He said, "If you are at a point in your life where you forget your blessings or are having a hard time, make a list. List everything you can think of that you have been blessed with and then you will realize how blessed you really are." I'm a list person, I'm a check-list person, & I'm a goal setter so this was right up my alley.

So, come! Follow me back from this sidetrack to the point. I made two lists: "Negative attributes that sneak into my head" & "What I actually AM and what I want to be".

What I felt described me:

Jealous, Envious, Failure, Leech, Failure (yes i realize i posted this twice), Stupid, No Life, Depressed, Angry, Sad, Afraid, Weak...

After I wrote that down I took a step back and gave that list the stank eye (you know the one). That is NOT who I am... that is NOT the truth.

What I am & hope to be:

Happy, Grateful, Blessed, Successful, Intelligent, Educated, Productive, Helpful, Humble, Fearless, Strong, Faithful, Lovable, Caring, Hopeful, Vivacious, Full of Life, Empathetic, Thoughtful, Brave, Kind, Eternal Perspective, Charitable, Loving, Patient, Steadfast... and the list will always go on.

Pull out your ruler and measure the distance of these two lists... The second is much longer than the first which means...that negative list has just received a roundhouse kick to the throat! On a lighter, less violent note - The glass IS half-full and it always will be. I put my faith in my Heavenly Father. He is the ONLY reason that I am & try to be brave & fearless.

"If we could perceive only a small part of the person God intends us to be, we would lose our fear and never doubt again.”

THAT ^^^^^^^^^^^^^

....is who I want to be. That is who I WILL be... with hard work, faith and dedication.

Hallelujah Hollaback.

[D]